Somewhere Beyond The Sea
by Youshi Semenjyu
Summary: "I would rather live and love where death is king than have eternal life where love is not ." This fanfiction takes place roughly 40 years after Order of the Phoenix...and Remus finally comes to terms...(Remus/Sirius, ***COMPLETE!***)
1. Night on the Endless Sea

Somewhere Beyond The Sea   
By DuoLordOfDeath  
  
Disclaimer: The characters nor the song are mine. They are property of J.K. Rowling and T.B. Harms Co.!  
  
  
"I would rather live and love where death is king than have eternal life where love is not ."  
  
-Robert G. Ingersoll   
  
  
~*Chapter One - Night On The Endless Sea*~  
  
  
The night...  
  
The soft whispering of voices came to his ears as he began to awaken. It was a vague murmur, no words were clear, and yet it was obvious that people were speaking to one another in secretive, hushed tones. It was like seeing through a foggy window; he could make out shapes and forms, but nothing definete, despite the close proximity the voices spoke in. It reminded him of something from long ago...something that his sleep-deprived mind struggled to remember, but couldn't quite grasp. The darkness seemed to consume all that he heard and returned it in a jumbled mess of inconsistancies...  
  
Below him, the ground lurched in a slow, painful manner, and fell, as though it were a lugubrious roller coaster car. The sensation caused his stomach to turn, and he groaned, putting a hand down to steady himself. But his palm failed to find the lumpy bedding as his support...rather, it was damp, rigid wood, grainy and unforgiving against his slight touch. A bit surprised, he withdrew his hand from it and rised his head, looking down.   
  
A cool breeze brushed against his fevered face as he looked up, brushing tawney strands of hair about his face. It smelled of sea salt and brine, and it held a certain dampness to it. Furrowing his brow, he attempted to open his eyes a bit further, trying to ignore the ill feeling, and blinked. Just as the voices were vague, so too were the shapes he saw. His vision was blurry, which was odd, considering that his entire life, he'd been gifted with keen eyesight. It was odd to think that now, after seventy-three years of perfect service, his eyes were failing. But after a moment, he realized that it was only due to sleep. It was then that he heard the unmistakable sound of crashing waves against the hull of a ship.  
  
Gasping, he stumbled to his feet as the ship lurched forward on the water again, and he steadied himself for it. This was not where he had been when he had fallen asleep only hours ago...how was it possible that he fell asleep in his own bed...and awoke on a ship in the middle of the sea? Ignoring the crowds of people that sat on the deck as he passed, he staggered to the front bow and grasped the railing tightly, looking overboard and readying himself to wretch.   
  
However...he never managed to get that far. Instead, he inhaled sharply.  
  
Gazing back at him from the rippling depths was his own reflection...but it wasn't. This young man that met his in the water was far from the face of the Remus J. Lupin that had fallen asleep in his lonely flat but hours ago.  
  
Tawney brown hair framed a young face where silvery strands had once fallen about an aged, world-weary countenace...clear blue eyes were wide with surprise...his face, once so lined with the weight of seventy years, was full and youthful. Strong but slender shoulders filled a set of shabby but well-tended robes...and no signs of lycanthropy were evident about him. Instinctively, he looked sharply up at the moon, and found that he could openly gaze upon the face of the full moon...with purely human eyes.  
  
"No...what is this..."he heard himself say, his voice strong and young once again. He stumbled back away from the railing and turned, his expression filled with confusion and fear. Several people were looking at him curiously, as if they all knew something that he did not. He also noticed that, aside from all of them being young and in the prime of their life, they were all dressed in one of two ways. Some were dressed in fine robes worn by witches and wizards, and others were dressed in the Muggle fashion...he found it odd that Muggles and magical folk would be in such close confines and be so blatant about their heritage...  
  
"Excuse me dear...but is something troubling you?" came a gentle voice from his left, and Remus looked over and found himself looking into the face of a young lady; a witch by her dress. She was a bit mousey but kind, and was smiling compassionately. Her eyes were young, and yet they held the weight and knowledge of many years in their tranquil gaze.  
  
Sighing, he put a hand to his forehead, forcing himself to ignore the fact that it too, was young and able once again. "Yes...I'm afraid I don't understand how I arrived here, nor why I look the way I do, or how it is that I can look at the moon without..." he trailed off. "I don't even know where I am..."  
  
The young woman laughed gently and put a hand on his shoulder reassureingly.   
  
"Do not be afraid...you are not the only one to not know...which I find odd, since all the others who were confused were Muggles. But you, quite obviously, are a wizard..." She paused, and looked out over the sea for a moment before looking back at him. "We are beyond the veil through which those who are living cannot pass, and from which spirits cannot return..."  
  
Remus could've sworn he felt his breath cease as she spoke those words. Beyond the veil...the veil...the vague murmuring of voices...it all went back to the night in which Remus' world had, for the second time, disentigrated around him and sent him spiraling into a hell that he had never fully recovered from. Remus closed his eyes as the forty year old memory of Sirius' death attacked him again; how many years had he gone trying to forget the haunting images...how many years had he awaited death, knowing that the wolf within would not give him up so easily...Ten years he had dedicated to the fall of Voldemort, and the thirty years after that had been in solitude, trying to force his memories into submission and keep his sanity. For the most part it had worked; he'd been able to remain calm, though hollow...and now...  
  
"I'm...dead..." he said flatly to himself as the young woman walked away. "Dead...and this..this ship must be...akin to the ferry that transported the dead across the River Styx into the Greek Underworld..."  
  
He shuddered at the thought of his afterlife being so cruel and dismal...if such was the cold depths of Death...then he far preferred the dismal realms of the living...  
  
  
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	2. Morning Upon The Golden Sands

~*Chapter Two - Morning Upon The Golden Sands*~   
  
The night went slowly for Remus as he stood on the front of the small ship, his eyes forever fixed on the inky horizon. Somewhere in the weary recesses of his mind, he told himself that it was rather silly, because there was nothing there...but the rest of his mind was elsewhere. He was dead...it was all over. His mind played over the memories of his life, from the night he was bitten and forever cursed...to when he met James, Sirius, and Peter...to his first kiss...His entire life seemed to play through his mind, and he couldn't help ut think that, despite all that he'd gone through...it had seemed so very dark...something foreboding always loomed over him despite the amount of cheer in any given memory.   
  
Sighing, he ran a hand through his hair and closed his eyes, looking somewhat upset and distraught.  
  
It was a bit startling when the first fingers of dawn began to sparkle against the water. Remus had thought that death would e all-encompassing, never-ending night...but as the warm light of morning fell upon his young face, he found himself thankfully wrong.  
  
Then he saw the shore.  
  
On the horizon, close ut yet so far, was a long stretch of land rising up out of the dark waters. He could make out long stretches of golden sands dotted with dark forms, all surrounding an expansive dock that jutted out into the sea. The sounds of a distant, dull roar found its way to his ears, and as they drew closer to the shore, he could see that the dark forms upon the sands were people; many many people, all staring out into the sea. Many of them had an expectant aire about them, as if they were waiting for something extremely important.   
  
On the ship, Remus noticed that several of the passengers had joined him at the railing, looking towards the shores with awe and hope. Several were scanning the crowd, and others were waving, tears in their eyes.  
  
Remus gasped then as a thought struck him. These people on the shore...they were waiting for the passengers on the ship...those on the shore were those who had made this journey before them...They were the spirits who had passed beyond the veil before him...  
  
Understanding and hope alighted across his face as he felt himself grip the railing tightly. He looked over the shore, leaning forward slightly as he tried to catch a glimpse of any familiar faces...Could it be at all possible that...that they were here as well? Waiting for him on the shores?  
  
The ship had begun docking preparations now; they were very clsoe to their destination now. Some of those on the shore had begun to yell out names of people on the ship, all of whom responded with joy and disbelief. Remus hurriedly looked around, his heart pounding in hope. But when no cries of greeting came up for him, he felt his hope slipping. Did those who died under curious or violent circumstances not travel to this lovely place? Closing his eyes, he relenquished his grip on the railing, knowing disappointment all too well. Sighing, he began to turn and start for where he would disembark onto land once the ship had docked.   
  
"Hey! HEY! Moony!"  
  
Remus froze as a familiar but long absent voice alighted over the shouts of the others. Hardly daring to believe, he turned slowly and looked towards the shores, his face turing a bit pale. The name 'Moony' only had meaning to a few people...three of whom were long dead. But this voice was not the voice of Sirius Black that Remus remembered so well...  
  
"Moony! I know you can hear me! Come back, you silly git!"  
  
Remus swallowed and found himself rushing back to the railing of the ship, where he gripped it tight and looked in the direction of the voice that he hadn't heard in over fifty years...  
  
Standing on the shore, near the water, was a pair of people, waving up at him. The taller one of the pair had their arm about the other's shoulders, and both were looking delighted to see him. Remus felt a twinge in his heart...  
  
"James...Lily..." he said softly to himself. There was no mistaking the couple that had addressed him. Perpetually messy black hair, hazel eyes behind wire-rimmed glasses...long red hair and vibrant green eyes...  
  
Remus closed his eyes and shook his head, laughing softly to himself. "Oh God..." he said to himself, and grinned disbelievingly down at them. "A silly git, am I?" he called in mock-indignation. He was surprised that he could find his voice, so thick were the emotions that were weighing on his mind.   
  
After the ship docked, Remus practically flew down the boarding ramp, threadbare robes waving haphazardly behind him. All other thoughts of death and misery fled him his mind as he heard his feet pound against the wooden dock; he ignored the sand that flew up behind him as he hurried across he golden beaches, and as James and Lily came into view, he tried to convince himself that this all wasn't just some perfect dream.   
  
But as James embraced his old friend tightly, laughing heartily, Remus felt an old warmth enter his soul that he hadn't felt in many many years...  
  
He was no longer alone.   
  
"Yes, a silly git," James replied, pulling away from Remus and looking into his eyes with a warm smile. "You're the only one I know who can come into paradise and look miserable. Cheer up! There's been enough sullen sulkiness around here for the past forty years with Padfoot around without you to add onto it-"  
  
"Padfoot?" Remus said suddenly, adrenaline shooting through his system. His eyes widened a bit as he looked at James in disbelief. It was as though he was asking for confirmation if he had heard Prongs correctly. James simply rolled his eyes and grinned knowingly.   
  
"Lily, can you believe this?" he asked with a good-natured grin. "He comes all this way...saw Sirius fall through the veil, and doesn't believe that he's here. Some things never change, do they?" he replied, and smiled back at his old friend.  
  
Remus fell silent, unsure of what to believe. Hope surged through his veins anew..and James stepped aside. "He's up there, on the edge of the shore," he replied, and pushed Remus playfully forward. Remus started a bit unsteadily, but as he walked through the throng of people, a path seemed to open up before him, and he glanced up as a figure became evident through the crowd. Remus stopped sharply, taking in the sight.  
  
He'd not seen Sirius in decades...but he could barely remember him ever looking so young. Black robes hung about his well-built frame, and shoulder-length, shaggy black hair framed his handsome face. His eyes were no longer sunken, and all the waxy paleness that were the legacies of Azkaban had fled form his face. He was looking at Remus with a fond, slightly crooked smile, leaning his cheek against his palm gently. A soft sea breeze rustled a few dark strands and settled then in his face, and he chuckled.  
  
"Been a long time, Remus...I've missed you, you know."  
  
Remus closed his eyes as he heard that voice, full and warm...there were no longer any traces of Azkaban about him...It was all so surreal.  
  
"Sirius," he heard himself say, and he slowly began to walk over to his lost lover, never letting his eyes fall from him for fear that he would vanish like a spector in the night. But vanish he did not, he only sat there, watching Remus' every move. When Remus was standing over him, he looked up into the shadow of Remus' face, and finally moved, reaching up to take his hand into his own.  
  
Remus looked at the hand that embraced his so readily...it was so warm and inviting...so real. Sinking to his knees at Sirius' side, he gripped Sirius' hand tightly and closed his eyes, tears finally slipping down his face. He shook his head as he let himself cry; he wept all the tears that he'd never been able to shed for his murdered friends; all the tears that he'd withheld for so many years...  
  
Warm arms embraced him tightly as he released all his suppressed woe, pulling him near. He regretted all that had never been said; all that was lost to him because of time and death...  
  
"Remus, why do you cry?" Sirius asked softly in his ear, keeping him near. "What is it that hurts you?"   
  
"There was...so much that I never said...never did...So much time was lost to us all, and-"  
  
"And now...we have all the time in the world," Sirius asserted, and pulled away, looking into Remus' eyes. "Nothing here can take you away from me...nor us away from James and Lily...I've been waiting for you too long to see you again in such a saddened state. What we had in our lives was riddled with unhappiness, darkness, and despair. There was nothing neither of us could do about it. But you shouldn't regret what's past...it can all be rectified now...all that you never said and did..you can say and do it now...nothing will stop you...Least of all me."  
  
Remus looked into Sirius' grey eyes, watching the vibrance that danced within them in faint awe. Sirius' words echoed in his mind heavily; in his heart, he knew Sirius was right...and he finally smiled.  
  
"I had hoped...that I'd find you here..." he said a it, and Sirius chuckled, leaning his forehead against his. Grinning, he looking at Remus fondly.  
  
"And here I am...waiting for you on these golden sands. I've been watching the ship come in every day...and here you are, finally."  
  
Remus smiled, but before he could speak another word, Sirius leaned forward and kissed him softly, a caress that had too long been a stranger to their lips.  
  
"I love you, Remus..."  
  
"And I you."  
  
  
~*~  
  
Somewhere beyond the sea  
  
Somewhere waiting for me  
  
My lover stands on golden sands  
  
And watches the ships that go sailing   
  
Somewhere beyond the sea  
  
He's watching for me  
  
If I could fly like birds on high  
  
Then straight to his arms I'd go sailing  
  
It's far beyond a star, it's near beyond the moon  
  
I know beyond a doubt  
  
My heart will lead me there soon  
  
We'll meet beyond the shore  
  
We'll kiss just as before  
  
Happy we'll be beyond the sea  
  
And never again I'll go sailing  
  
~*~  
  
  
~*Owari*~  
  
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